Dinosaurs are totally thin.

Whoa!! You guys! We learned tonight that Whitney doesn’t like liars! And then Whitney learned from Jay that, in New York, you can never put anything past anyone. I learned both those lessons this week when the cable channel NY1 told us all that 40 degrees is “balmy.”

My “Whitney freaks out on Olivia” fantasy is growing. This week I imagined Whitney’s eyes shooting hot red lasers towards Olivia’s work area and just incinerating her whole head of curls. How rude was that when she didn’t want to hear about Whitney’s drama because they are “adults”? Hearing about Whitney’s drama is WHY SHE WAS CAST ON THE SHOW! Unacceptable.

Theory of the week: Whitney’s friend, Allie, might be so sad all the time because she wears so much black eye makeup. Maybe the blackness seeps into her head, filling her brain with dark thoughts?

And how is my life in NYC? My husband came for a visit this week and we went to the Museum of Natural History (see pic above). It was educational (the moon was formed in a month!) and fun, except that my cheese-less turkey sandwich cost nine dollars.

My winter coat is super COMF !!!

Tonight Whitney said she is overwhelmed by The City and I totally get that. There are lots of things you have to learn when you are new to NY (i.e. subways, where to not get murdered, how to street dance). I feel like LA is easier on newcomers. Do you think that is true? As long as you can read a map, you can drive yourself wherever you need to go and not have to worry about subway station closures or delays or snowstorms. You don’t have to rely on others to get where you need to go.

I feel like The City is mocking me with all their sunny shots of beautiful late summer/early fall weather. I wish I had been here for that. I want it to snow on Whitney as she walks half a mile to her Brooklyn office. (See pic above for today’s snowy view from our new office!)

I am glad to see that Whitney is still wearing happy LA colors. I was on the train with red boots and a purple polka dot scarf and I felt a little like a clown next to all these girls in all black. BORING and DEPRESSING. I’m not giving in to the all black thing.

Final thought - Did that friend of Olivia’s say his shoes were “super comf” ? I will start incorporating this new word into my vocabulary tomorrow.

Today was our first day in the Brooklyn production offices. It’s a cool space with a dance studio feel which makes me want to pop n lock ALL the time. There is a mini fridge full of Diet Coke which makes the 45 minute commute worth it.

I will try to not let a whole week go by before I post again. . .

Tonight's episode of The City

If you don’t watch The City, then you are missing out on Olivia. Olivia is why I’m glad I’m the only girl at my job (Peggy Olson’s Unite!). If Olivia shot me those looks of hers (half bitchy, half vapid) I would have to smack her in the face. Though, to be honest, I would probably end up smacking her in the face only IN MY MIND because, in reality, I would go into the bathroom and silently cry because it hurts when pretty people are mean to you.

Jay bores me to tears. My husband’s conversational skills could beat up Jay’s conversational skills in about 3 seconds. There are a crazy amount of funny, smart people in The City and Whitney hasn’t found any of them.

There is, however, one thing Whitney has that I don’t have – that awesome purple beaded top she wore tonight. Purple makes me think of grape popsicles and unicorns and grape-flavored unicorns.

In other news, today was my first day on my new show. It's going to be great. The other writers are smart and funny and cool and the commissary had quality cookies. I WAS hoping for free Diet Cokes because I drink it frequently and am hoping that aspartame is a fountain of youth, but I guess I'll have to buy my own. For now.

It is snowing-g on me and Whitney.

Today is snowing. Or as Whitney would say, it is "snowing-g." For reasons unknown, she adds a hard "g" to the ends of her "ing" words. Listen for it. I have never heard anyone else in LA speak this way. I kind of love her for it.

I went to lunch today in my new hood (the financial district) and learned the streets are EMPTY on the weekends! Very few cars and very few people. I like this a lot. The snow is kind of pretty but I'm way smarter than to stay out in it. I've been sitting in my studio all day and just ordered some cough medicine and cupcakes for delivery. They will deliver almost anything here. I guess it is good that work starts Monday because otherwise I wouldn't leave my place until the NY1 news channel tells me it is 70 degrees out there.

(The pic above was taken today from the 32nd floor of my building. White snow! No cars!)

Does Whitney get cold?

I've been here a couple of days. Getting settled in my new apartment. It is so cold. Imagine a Russian train station. It's like that, only I don't have a big furry hat. One good thing about the cold weather is that it kind of makes you WANT to ride the subway because it is warm down there near the core of the planet. Everyone on the subway is sad, by the way. I wonder why that is? I wonder if we will see Whitney riding the train. I also wonder if her contract says she will only "live" here during the summer. I totally should have had that put in MY contract.

I am officially living downtown so I guess I can't be a Social, which is probably best because I don't want to have dinner parties on my freezing cold sky deck.

My new job starts Monday. I have met one of the other writers and he is cool and seems as excited as me.

(Also, a shot out to my friend Brandon who named the blog.)

Whitney PORT isn't the only one moving to The City...

I'm Samantha. I'm a TV writer from LA and tomorrow I move to The City for a new job on a new show! Just like Whitney. I am pretty sure we will be living parallel lives. You'll be able to read all about my adventure here. Will I have to choose between the downtown crowd and the uptown socials? Will I have to join a street gang? How do girls who live in cold weather maintain cute hair? Hell if I know. . .